When Things fall apart..

Hey Blog peoples... This week is going not to well... Once again my self esteem is at all time low... im doing a assignment on this book "Things Fall Apart" its really sweet. The main character Okonkwo sadly reminds me of myself. Through the novel he fears to be like his his father... weak and indebt... and through the novel he fears being weak to the point that he kills himself instead of being captured by the weak white man. I really don't like that road... I don't wanna go on some big ramble about my life blowing cause well people got it worse off then i do. Its probably just me.. its like whenever im at school people talk to me like im special or something... like really... Good news is people like my grad ring and rugby tomorrow. Bad news is that monica has been taken by some guy lol more like my ex co-worker... he's a asshole anyways. I can't really see myself in a long distance relationship in high school... Sometimes they just aren't worth it... Parents get involved, friends get involved.... and for some reason i keep getting the drinkers,druggies, whores and if they aren't one of those they are usually all three of them.... I have no idea what im gonna do after high school rugby to control my anger.. like what happened to me? grade 9 and 10 I was the good kid that would never get angry and was content with just sitting at home and playing video games. If this is maturity i definetly don't like it.. not one bit... blah like i don't know i try to take a break from relationships.. But it isn't exactly working I guess but then again i haven't been in a relationship yet soooo im not worried.