Oh well

Well its been a long time since I last blogged. I must say these past few months have been interesting. From picking up the habit of drinking and smoking (Cigars) to being a complete loner in my basement I certainly have come a long ways haha. Since the last time I blogged things have changed. I've changed around my friends, went back to school (upgrading), and now im working full time. Life is alittle tougher then I expected after school but oh well just have to keep rolling with the punches.
Its strange however that I have no interest in anything right now. I don't seem to want anything in life. No relationships, no new clothing, nothing it must be just that I have no actual sense of class and that I just don't give a fuck. I've began growing a beard...Its alittle scruffy and patchy but it will surely be a great beard after a month or two. Oh well see how it turns out. Until next time.

Might as well go for a soda No body hurts, no body cries

Today was very uninteresting for me. I got up smelling of cheese. I got up and ate and then i went into my basement and did whatever. Tomorrow should be more interesting.. For I have rugby practice once again and the coaches are not happy with the numbers.... Cause well our rugby team isn't as dedicated as it once was. I don't get it really.... These guys that come to our practices they take all these breaks and they go to Rothesay while I never stop moving or take a break unless the coach says... but hey its rugby gotta stay tough. Good news is I have a good chance this year I've gained 40 pounds since last year hahahaha... Sooooo Im basically the biggest lad on my team. I gotta lose the weight though this summer. Its gonna be hard work outs and dieting thats gonna get me to the 200 pounds of muscle i wanna be haha. Gonna be a good summer no doubt.

Its about time

Hi blog. Well its been 10 years but I finally talked to my biological father. It was on facebook but whatever I said what I had to say. Im pretty sure I made him feel like shit. Im happy I've gotten 10 years of this horrible stuff off my chest. Im not going to forgive him though. Nothing can make me forgive him. No free way through college, no brand new car, no nothing. He didn't pick a good time to try to get in contact with me. Yesterday was the 12th anniversary of him leaving me and my bro and that was day before my bro's birthday. No one has idea how much I hate that man. The night that he left is still burned into my mind. Waking up in the middle of the night at five years old, hearing your mom crying by the sink with a letter in her hand and your left thinking your dad is dead.... then he comes back in his black leather coat, sunglasses and a big smile on his face with another woman with him who is not your mom. Turns out the women is your mom's best friend. One month later I find myself in a small basement sleeping on a air mattress cause my mom lost her job and the house. These things I replay in my mind every day. I wish I could get rid of those memories...

Yo Blog. Its still march break and im in my basement. It hasn't been bad so far. I got a little thing settled with friends, I forced WoW on two of my best friend :).. well for 10 days that is. I went to a friends house and partied it up lmao. Ahhh seen alot of movies =). Im afraid though tomorrow my fun will end. My brother's birthday is tomorrow! :D and I have to study for two tests D: . Oh well... all's well that ends badly. I started the addiction of WoW for the 3rd time now..... I really need a girlfriend lmao... anyways thats all.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!

HELLO HELLOOOOO

Well this march break is so far so good. Im back in my basement with my gaming systems and I filed my T4 and getting a sizeable sum of money :) . Also other good news I maybe hanging out with some homies on thursday :D . My big promotion to metals person is a huge success as well now i don't have to work with stinky bottles! Now I am sitting back watching the parliamentary debate channel and sucking on a pepsi bottle... My how life is grand.

If you never tear down your wall people will give up and walk away from you

Hey Blog peoples lol... So far this march break is alright I guess.... Went to movies with Tyler,Agib,jessica,sketch, and kevin lmao. ahh taken is alright.. I just hope my parents never see it cause they'll get all sketchy about me going to europe next year... Anyways lets get right to the point Mandy my dear friend is sick which makes me very sad. :( ... Also I finally came to a conclusion of the fate of the group of friends I have. The problem once again that I find myself in..... Whenever I hang out with one group im left feeling guilty cause the other person is not allowed to hangout with another certain person. I don't get it really... WELL I DO but heck im not writing about that. This has been basically going on with me since the break up of that blue crew I hanged out with 2 year or so years ago. I hang out with one group and its either i feel like shit for doing it or the other group of friends gets pissed with me. OR BOTH! okay... the pissed with me hasn't gone happened since last year but whatever. Now im left pondering are my friends messed up? or am i taken as some stupid kid in their eyes? ADVICE!: DON'T TEAR APART A GROUP OF YOUR FRIENDS OVER A STUPID FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL RELATIONSHIP! :) . Maybe I just take these things to seriously and ya I do friday night's hockey game proved that but fuck back on topic don't drag your friends into your love life. For those who read this and you know who you are don't even bother hanging with me until you can get your shit straight =D

When Things fall apart..

Hey Blog peoples... This week is going not to well... Once again my self esteem is at all time low... im doing a assignment on this book "Things Fall Apart" its really sweet. The main character Okonkwo sadly reminds me of myself. Through the novel he fears to be like his his father... weak and indebt... and through the novel he fears being weak to the point that he kills himself instead of being captured by the weak white man. I really don't like that road... I don't wanna go on some big ramble about my life blowing cause well people got it worse off then i do. Its probably just me.. its like whenever im at school people talk to me like im special or something... like really... Good news is people like my grad ring and rugby tomorrow. Bad news is that monica has been taken by some guy lol more like my ex co-worker... he's a asshole anyways. I can't really see myself in a long distance relationship in high school... Sometimes they just aren't worth it... Parents get involved, friends get involved.... and for some reason i keep getting the drinkers,druggies, whores and if they aren't one of those they are usually all three of them.... I have no idea what im gonna do after high school rugby to control my anger.. like what happened to me? grade 9 and 10 I was the good kid that would never get angry and was content with just sitting at home and playing video games. If this is maturity i definetly don't like it.. not one bit... blah like i don't know i try to take a break from relationships.. But it isn't exactly working I guess but then again i haven't been in a relationship yet soooo im not worried.